He sat there with his eyes open

Wondering why had I spoken

About a life style

Motivated by the right smile

Where I planned on giving him my best

Filled with many intimacies

So this I must confess

Sit back and just rest

I’ll take my time

All u gotta do is say yes

Still the challenge is knowing

How deeply I can express

What’s in my heart

The softer part

Guarded by my failure proof vest

So let me tell you…

With one look

He wanted to consume my very existence

Between a woman and a man

He couldn’t understand his feeling

That was more than a one night type business

See although he didn’t know it

Possibly too proud to admit

My demeanor had him trapped

Shhhh….I told you to relax

This is just my observation, in fact

You see the curve of my back

Fits the curl of your lips

And your desire to come back

Is controlled by the switch of my hips

My hold on him was such a

Forceful opportunity that could not be missed

But don’t mistake my description of the physical

For all that I have to offer

You see I felt this before it became sexual

And by the end of it all you’ll be saying

Damn I love her.  

That’s my word.

Peace.

Poetry

Mental liberation feeds societal integration 

Or rather association leads to cultural elimination

While sexual relations come after years of maturation

But self-disintegration still exists through our greed/hate dictations

I wish my internalizations didn’t create my impatience

to seek a better occupation in this white owned nation

But I can no longer stay in a state of ingnoration

Because I know capitalization has killed our motivation

to be true to our natives

and disregard them as wastin’

A life of sex, drugs, and alcohol

Like Uncle Sam didn’t put them all

US, ME, YOU

the ones with the darker hue

up against that manipulative wall

Without a second glance we look past the degradation

By applying economic intimidation

So that when the poor seek salvation

Our arrogant misinterpretation

Of a life and death situation

Misplaces their frustration and assumes a lack of determination

When in reality the case is

These black faces

Have left bloody traces

And we no longer stop and think what the case is

Never forget about emancipation

Even though they still regard our race as

A people filled with hate and

Constantly bringing down the nation

I am hopeful to see the end of marginalization

But not without your cooperation

So until the next time I’m in your graces

To address the displacement

Sit back, think, and relate this

To your own demoralization

And never forget who that lady Crystal Renee is.

That’s my word.

Peace.

Poetry

They say I’m black listed by a list run by whites

But I say I’m that gifted

with a thick mind and perfect sight

So I know how wack this is

To be first world with so much plight

Kids selling their bodies

Roaming our streets at night.

No home to go to

Alone and neglected

With no choice but to fight

So I attack this mission

All with perfect precision

Look at the way my words make incisions

Still don’t understand?

Then you should switch your position

So it’d give you better vision

In your mind you know you see these divisions.

Of a nation boasting equality

Then why do most minorities stay locked in poverty?

To me it’s all a trap

Think back, for 400 years

When they tried to close the gap

1,2,3,4,5,6 SNAP!

That’s the sound it made

When they kicked away the stump

And her head swung back

But now it’s 2007

And many blacks have gone to heaven

Yet still left with the feeling

like our lives ain’t worth that much and

So we’re dealing with feeling like school is the only way out

Try not to slip

Lord knows they’d point it out

Damn another black who chose to go a different route

The system will say he failed

and brought the true nigger out.

But despite the years of pain

I still find it in my people to look through the rain

And hope that in the end

We will be the ones

To make it through all the disdain.

That’s my word.

Peace.

Poetry

Some people think my lightness is equated to my intelligence (old habits die hard) while others think my lightness is too far from my blackness. My skin seems to be representing some sort of glitch that occurred somewhere down the line. The only thing that should really matter is what I think. Well here I am occupying what seems like a very big grey area, not fully taking up one space. To deal with my confusion, embarrassment and pride I decided to write. I figured if I lay it out I won’t have to lay somebody out. I wrote this a while back, but it has been a part of my experiences since I was smart enough to understand what my family’s words meant.

Before you read it I want you to know that I’ve always been nervous about sharing this, but I’m 24 now and I’ve gained some knowledge since my earlier days. So I figure I don’t have much to lose, other than my guard. So I’m letting it down and allowing you in. Hope you enjoy it::

They point out that I’m light

But inside they mean white

Never enough melanin

I swear my parents are black

That’s what I keep tellin’ ‘em

So who did you get our eyes from?

‘Cause real blacks don’t have them

Have me caught in between rejection and bewilderment

I meant what are you mixed with?

Like you changing the words really makes a difference

From a little girl to a young lady

I’ve been black along the way

But still they wanna say

So which one of your ancestors gave into your master that day

‘Cause girl you know your hair ain’t blactually that way

So I express my plight

In hopes of generating insight

While they were tryna show me the actual facts

As if I should erase the perm and bring my natural back

That’s my word.

Peace.

Poetry

Shit happens. All the time. Every second of every day. On every corner  and in every hallway. Shit happens. Some shit is good, while other shit is just fucked up. Right now I feel really irritated and agitated and underrated and overqualified and out of touch.

I don’t even know where to begin to describe the feeling that is in me. I have no idea where to start. I guess that’s why I just started cussing. I don’t mean to offend anyone this is just my place of peace to release.

So what am I going to do about this? Build a bridge and get over it. Maybe go squeeze some more lemons. Possibly slap the next person to piss me off. OK scratch the last one, I’ve never been a violent person. Well not unless I’m provoked, but that rarely happens.

You’re probably wondering where I’m going with all of this. Let’s just say I’m trying real hard to look for the bright side and I’m doing my best to find happiness in knowing that shit could be worse. I would pray but sometimes I feel like God can’t help me if I don’t pick up my feet and put in the work first. After all, life IS what we make it…right? RIGHT??

Holler if you hear me.

That’s my word.

Peace.

Everything & Anything