I was just talking to a great friend of mine, Jonelle Ward. It was a really good convo.Do not underestimate the power of conversation. It is one of the world’s most prized possessions. No amount of social networking and technology can ever measure up to the intricacies of real live conversation.
Life is about choices. Everything we do, unlike breathing, is a choice. Don’t get it twisted. We learn, we adapt, grow, evolve, and respond to change. The directions our lives take are up to us and we can either choose to grow and learn or get swallowed up by the rising waters. However, learning is not always immediate. Usually a lot of time has to pass before the lessons become clear. Everything has its time.
- Crystal Coburn, always.
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Above is an entry from my “journal” and I felt like sharing this part of it with you. After talking to Jonelle last night I was able to (re)confirm that human interaction and conversation is a fundamental element of our lives. NOTHING can replace it. This might be something you’ve heard already or are hearing more and more but if you can lift your head up from the comp every once and while you’ll see that some people are starting to go back to the basics and what is old becomes new again.
Take care guys.
Peace.
P.S.: I really like the sky in this picture and I felt like the sun breaking through the clouds was fitting.
I took a walk to the post office today to mail some forms for a new job I’m starting. I had the option of driving there and the whole thing would have been over in less than 1/2 hour but I told myself yesterday that I would walk instead. I haven’t been very active lately and for anyone who knows the feeling it can leave you more tired than if you were regularly active. So since my motivation to run is at an all time low I figured walking would be a good thing to do since the post office was a good 20 minute walk away.
In this day and age walking that far is completely unheard of in the suburbs, but today I felt like walking would do more than just get me to my destination, and it did. I also brought Jay-Z’s latest album, The Blueprint 3 along with me. I haven’t listened to this album from beginnig to end because the tracks that were leaked didn’t impress me as I hoped they would. Since it’s release I usually skip to the songs I like and keep it moving. I guess you could say I’ve been quite resistant to hearing the album in its entirety because I had hoped I would get the same gut-wrenching feeling I did when I heard Blueprint 1. I also hoped every song would be like D.O.A. and Run This Town, ridiculously hard hitting.
So with those two things in mind I set out for my walk. When the whole adventure was complete I had been outside for a total of 2 hours, possible 2 and 1/2 and there were a few things I enjoyed. I noticed that as I was walking the people driving were looking at me, so naturally I looked straight ahead out of fear of being seen. That in itself is an odd concept because there was no way I wasn’t going to be seen, I was OUTSIDE afterall. But there’s something about a Jay-Z album that just boosts your confidence and can turn a situation around. Instead of looking away I started to look at the cars moving by and the people in them. espcially when I came to a traffic light. I felt good that I could overcome something so small when it seemed so big. I walked with my head up and my shoulders back. That may sound weird because I was just going to the post office not down a runway, but walking in Brampton is very much something you do alone. It’s not like downtown Toronto where everyone else is walking and you’re almost bumping into other people as you move along.
I felt good about my walk. Unfortunately I developed blisters on my heels because my socks kept shrugging down and left the skin rubbing on my sneakers. Still I feel like I earned something. My head had time to think and sort out things and just be in the moment. I noticed the colours of leaves, I noticed cracks in the road, I noticed how warm the air was and even that traffic lights doen’t stay red for as long as I thought they did. I noticed the things that I usually find trivial when I’m driving.
I’m happy I gave that time to myself. And I can now say that I really adore The Blueprint 3. The album flows into itself in a way I had not recognized before and now I’m able to appreciate that. The songs I replayed the most were Already Home and Empire State of Mind, but for different reasons. I’ll let you know those reasons in the next couple of days.
Thanks for stopping by and have a nice day.
Peace.
I wrote this short paragraph during one of Trey Anthony’s workshops. It’s not about anyone in particular, but it came from an exercise she had us go through. I was quite happy with what came out of it.
The Man in the Mirror
by: Crystal Coburn
Ask him 20 questions and he’ll give you 20 answers. A thoroughbred birthed to fulfil the brightest destiny. He was always confident, even from birth. He has broad shoulders, claims an above average height, boasts smooth skin, is clean shaven, and has a deeply soft, but assertive voice. Just beautiful. As a creation beyond God’s talent he became the model to measure greatness by. His strides were long and ambitiously filled with the excitement of finding the next best thing. He only went forward in life, never backwards. People looked at him with intense commitment whenever he walked into the room. No kids. No wife. And happily single. If anyone knew that at home he filled his hours with escorts to fill the voids that he always said no woman could they would be in disbelief. He pulled all nighters with two, maybe three if the first or second weren’t good enough. Once they left he curled up in a ball and cried about a mother who never let him cry.
Tonight is your chance to get LAID. It’s a sure thing actually and there won’t be anyone there to ruin your chances. And after its done, you’ll be talking about it with your friends, maybe even strangers for a long time. Tonight is sure to be a learning experience you didn’t know you could have. So come out and get LAID. I know I will be!
For those of you who want more info on how to get LAID watch the video below:
Annnndd I, yes YOURS TRULY, has contributed a story to the book so you should be extra excited to purchase a copy if you’re not already convinced that SHANNON BOODRAM is awesome already. I must say it’s an amazing accomplishment to have your book published and I’m ECSTATIC that she included me in the process. Thanks Shannon!
Here’s the details about the book:
Laid: Young People’s Experience with Sex in an Easy Access Culture:
Laid is a non-fiction anthology that takes a peer mediation approach to sexual education. Youth ages 18-25 across North America were asked to share a life changing sexual experience they went through in their teens. Contributors were asked to share their stories as though they were telling it to a best friend, lecturing was prohibited. As a result, Laid is not your typical sexual education book. It’s raw, honest, steamy, scary, inspiring and eye opening stories.
The book is separated into five chapters based on five common young adult sexual scenarios:
Chapter 1: Hookups
Chapter 2: Amazing Sexual Experiences
Chapter 3: Consequences from Sex (pregnancy, abortion, STD contraction
Chapter 4: Date rape and Sexual Abuse
Chapter 5: Abstinence (not from sexuality all together just from sex )
No two stories are alike.
LAID has contributors who share positive stories as well as those who have dealt with teenage pregnancy, abortion, STI contraction, hookups, date rape, sexual abuse and living with HIV.
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This is what I learned from getting LAID, and I’m not just saying this because I’m a good friend of Shannon’s, I’m saying this because I really like the way she approached sex and I was able to take away some real lessons without feeling like I’m in a boring sex-ed class.
Sugar coating your sexual experiences is not helping anyone.
You’ll believe your lies and continue faking it.
You’ll lead your partners to believe they’re better than they are only further subjecting the world to bad sex.
You’ll never get what you really want.
Having a good sex life is like getting a good career. You have to know what you want and work towards it. No one is just going to hand it to you and it won’t manifest itself out of nothing. Take a look at your own sex life and think about that. Is it as great as you like, are there things that you’ve lied about to convince yourself it’s great?
While you think about that make sure you come out tonight for Shannon’s FREE FREE FREE FREE book release party. There will be readings (I WILL BE READING), there will be performances, food, chances to speak with her (she’s awesome) and most of all, HER BOOK WILL BE AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE!!!
So you’re coming right? To get LAID? At least come out and see what all the fuss is about. You won’t be disappointed. You can hit me up for more details or find Shannon at Those Girls Are Wild if you want to know more.
On my birthday I was looking for something fun and exciting to do, and while I didn’t come up with anything chart topping I decided to take a trip to the Toronto Women’s Bookstore for the first time. I’ve heard about it in the past but have never been, and since I was coming into a new year in my life I thought it would be productive to do something that has been on my to-do list for too long.
I went with my cousin because we’re both book worms and we’ve always been able to blow through 300+ paged books over a couple days without breaking a sweat since we were little.
As I was looking over the collection of books in the store I found myself looking for books with a “good” story, ones filled with pain and agony, misappropriation and deceit. To me I wanted one that would standout from the rest by having the ability to make me feel slightly unnerved. Besides this task being hard to do, simply because the description on the back was all I had to go on, I ended up thinking to myself, “Why am I so drawn to sad stories full of dark truths? Why is that the kind of book I was looking for?”
After some thinking I came up with this. I’ve realized that I am drawn to sad stories in the same way that I’m drawn to sad songs. There is definitely one thing that I get from it and it’s that they’re truthful, but not just any kind of truth. I feel like its the kind that holds me in place where I can remove the usual mask and feel the emotion. I get the chance to experience something my daily smile never tells, and it actually feels good.
So often we go through life being “fine” when there’s so much more between the letters, no matter how big or small the font, that books that are the complete opposite of that become intriguing and to be honest, quite inspiring for me. It may sound weird to hear it, and possibly slightly morbid but I’m thinking some of you may agree with me.
The book I ended up choosing was Ugly by Constance Briscoe. It’s a true story of the author’s life with her physically and emotionally torturous (abusive is an understatement) mother while she lived in London, England from age 4-17 I believe. I have since finished it so I may be a little off in the time frame, but I have to say that her story has been a motivation for me. She has written her story so candidly that many times my mouth literally dropped open from what I was reading. I HIGHLY recommend reading it because after I finished it made me take a good look at my life. There’s things that she had to live through that NO child should ever have to and still she came out of it way better than expected. To me her fight has truly been amazing. So often it’s books like these that help to push me along and be better over the typical self-help book.
In the end, I found the book with the great story.
When I say, “Money doesn’t make my world go ’round.” I mean, although I know I need money to go ’round, I would prefer not to make myself dizzy going ’round. Get it?
What (I thought) was lost is now found. While organizing my room I found the note pad that I thought I lost a few weeks ago. It made me smile when I opened the pocket of my laptop bag and could feel the shape of it. I was hoping it would come back to me.
I am in most of the places you're willing to look and some of the places you wouldn't expect me to be. If you aren't able to locate me anywhere hit me up here; crystal.coburn@gmail.com
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